"We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are." (Anais Nin, except imagine the umlaut which I can't figure out how to do on top of the second a)
That goes for complaining -- "wow, it took us eleven hours, that was a first and we got to see many things along the way!" vs "jeez, it took us eleven hours! What an exhausting trip that delayed our arrival and we missed things we wanted to be here for, dammit!" -- AND for how complaints are received. I know if I'm in a peaceful mood when someone complains, I just see it as them wanting to share -- misery not only likes company, it demands it! -- and mostly they just want to get a "there there you poor thing! But hey, I CARE!" response so they don't feel alone.
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2008-12-21 07:11 pm (UTC)That goes for complaining -- "wow, it took us eleven hours, that was a first and we got to see many things along the way!" vs "jeez, it took us eleven hours! What an exhausting trip that delayed our arrival and we missed things we wanted to be here for, dammit!" -- AND for how complaints are received. I know if I'm in a peaceful mood when someone complains, I just see it as them wanting to share -- misery not only likes company, it demands it! -- and mostly they just want to get a "there there you poor thing! But hey, I CARE!" response so they don't feel alone.