Politics and Religion Rant

[urbpan]

NPR has been spending a lot of time talking to Iowans in the runup to the Caucus. It makes me realize a few things: first, this early caucus crap gives Iowa way too much power. There's got to be a fair way to run our primary/caucus system--I understand that all the states can't have their primaries on the same day, because then the candidates would ignore the little states altogether. But listening to the people they speak to in Iowa, (and to be fair, New Hampshire) makes me think they should be ignored.

One lady they spoke to said her main concern was that God should be put back in his rightful place in society (CHURCH, maybe?) and they asked "where's that?" and she replied "First. They gunna take him off the money and then ooga googa ooga..." I can't remember how she ended her sentence because I was already ranting to myself in my kitchen. "Hey lady, you know what country puts God first? IRAN! GO MOVE THERE." This "taking God off the money" gibberish is a bible-nut conspiracy theory that floats around every election cycle. Frankly, I think they SHOULD take "God" off the money (you know, on account of the Constitution declaring that the government will respect no religion) but any candidate who said so would be tarred and feathered.

Then they spoke to an old gent. "Well, I like huntin.' When they talk about gun control it hits pretty close to the heart." Are you hunting with an AK-47? If not, FUCKING RELAX. Hunting rifles and shotguns will never be outlawed--until Giuliani is elected, and sends his shock troops out to disarm all dissenters, who will be branded with the sign of 911 and rounded into camps.

The more I write, the more I disagree with myself. The nutjobs in Iowa and New Hampshire make the campaign more interesting. They're making Romney sweat, feign tears, and explain his weird underwear cult on national television. They're sacrificing the front-runners on their bizarre altars of Mike "Hucklebee" (as one Iowan supporter insisted on calling him). They're forcing the moderates, like the Des Moines newspaper's editorial staff, and former second-banana-to-the Nobel Prize winner Joe "Benedict Arnold" Lieberman, to remind everyone that John McCain is slightly less insane-looking and reactionary compared to the rest of the Republicans. At least he is willing to take a stand against TORTURE (isn't that the least we can do as Americans?) being the only Man among the field of pansies who has any experience in the matter.

I'm out of time. Thanks, enjoy your day. It's still 12 degrees.

Comments

[antarcticlust.livejournal.com]

Hear, hear! Romney's statements about church-going and religion and such were incredible enough to distract me from my utter frustration and bewilderment at Ron Paul's increasing popularity.

[audacian.livejournal.com]

stract me from my utter frustration and bewilderment at Ron Paul's increasing popularity.

Scary, isn't it? I think Marx would agree.

[antarcticlust.livejournal.com]

What bothers me is that so much focus is put on his very reasonable stance on Iraq that everyone is blind to his opinions on abortion and the environment.

[audacian.livejournal.com]

We don't call 'em "loltarians" for nothing.

[antarcticlust.livejournal.com]

Wow, a green party member? That's crazy! Paul's environmental position is awful - his solution to "pollution" is that all public land should be privately owned, and then if anyone pollutes your land, water, or air (how would you quantify that?) you would sue them.

On his website, THAT is his stance on the "environment."