Mini Review of Alien3--Chock full of spoilers

[urbpan]

A very promising and valuable franchise is somehow sadly mishandled, and good ideas are allowed to become a very average horror movie. The movie's first misfire happens during the opening credits, when all the characters from the previous sequel, except Ripley, are killed off. Soon enough an interesting premise develops: Ripley is trapped in a prison colony with collection of homicidal maniac religious fanatics--and The Alien. Almost as soon as interesting characters are developed, they become monster-fodder. Once the shock has worn off, the viewers are left with less interesting minor characters, on whom no sympathy can be wasted, and who are knocked off one by one in humdrum sequence. Most disappointing is the corruption of Giger's Alien, who is rendered in unconvincing CGI, resulting in a monster that invites comparison to "Anaconda." The sudden and baffling last act appearance of the designer of the "Bishop" android heralds the general unraveling of the story. Finally, whoever decided to muddy the Alien milieu with religious symbolism (especially evident in Ripley's ludicrous chest-bursting plunge into the lava of mount doom--or is it the foundry that the Terminator is destroyed in?) should get out of sci-fi and back into Catholic school. The alternate version seems to improve some of the problems, and exchanges a bad chest-burst dog puppet for a silly-looking fake ox carcass. Once again, the plot is essentially the same as "The Thing from Another World." ("Who Goes There?")

Comments

[zipotle.livejournal.com]

I'm expecting creepycrawlies when I see your posts now. I read it as "chock full of spiders" and shuddered.

PLEASE DON'T POST SPIDER PICS IN RETURN OMG

Or those damned centipedes. GAH

[agelena.livejournal.com]

How odd. I read "chock full of spiders" too.

Um...sorry about my icon.

Chock-full, or just a sprinkling?

[urbpan.livejournal.com]

My most recent post has two arachnids in it--but they're toward the end.

Ummm... chock full of spiders

[brush-rat.livejournal.com]

You were warned. Unfortunately, sometimes we have to see for ourselves how bad it is. This explains why I've seen all the Highlander sequels and Aliens sequels. So I've resisted the Batman flick with Ahnold as Mr. Freeze.

Batman

[miz-geek.livejournal.com]

A radio station here keeps referring to the new Batman movie as 'the first one without plastic nipples.' Don't know if that's a sign of improvement or not

Re: Batman

[cottonmanifesto.livejournal.com]

That is such an odd thing to note!

Re: Batman

[miz-geek.livejournal.com]

I think there was some commentary from the smartass brigade on the fact that the earlier costumes had them.

But yeah, a little odd.

Re: Batman

[brush-rat.livejournal.com]

The costumes from the third film had really prominent nipples (and aureoles) on both Batman and Robin. Once you became aware of them, it became really distracting. You stopped wondering how they were going to thwart the villain and the mantra "what the hell's the point of that?" ran over and over in your head.

Generally, I'm in favor of nipples... never mind, there's nowhere to take that that's going to sound good.

http://www.fantasfilm.com/image/x-batman-forever-jj-2.jpg


http://imagesource.allposters.com:80/images/MMPH/215842.jpg

Re: Batman

[miz-geek.livejournal.com]

Ok, maybe she meant that I'm odd for noting that :)

But thank you for that visual confirmation that I'm not crazy. I have to admit, I never really thought I'd find myself doing a google image search on "batman nipples".