The Urban Pantheist

Hey maybe I should save this for next year, but I just blundered on an old post that I think is pretty good and worth sharing again. It's (right around) the ninth anniversary of my physically following through on my principled stand against human reproduction. I explain my rationale here.

I'm feeling really good right now. I know that LiveJournal is supposed to be a forum for complaints, but please forgive me and allow me to exult.

First, it's hot and sunny, as it should be in June; it's my favorite kind of weather. I don't mind sweating, I like to wear as few clothes as is necessary, and I like light. The dogs, who are normally puddlephobic sought out the only puddle in the park to stand in. The starlings are teaching their young how to find bugs in the freshly mowed grass.

I just came from the doctor, for a new-health-insurance checkup. Recently I have accepted that I have anxiety around the topic of going to the doctor, so my amazing wonderful wife cottonmanifesto accompanied me. The doctor, looking somewhat like Julia Roberts (according to my wife-- I don't notice these things) and therefore I will give her the similar-to-the-real-thing pseudonym "Dr. Brockavich," didn't flinch at having the patient's spouse handy. She asked many behavioral and health history questions and basically told me I was all right. Highlights include the doctor using the words "not overweight" to describe me (and I weighed out at 155, about the same as when I was wearing smaller pants(?)) and not having anything thrust into any of my orifices. The doctor also told me "your drinking is right at the upper limit of what I consider acceptable," which I will use as an endorsement, like a so-so movie review: "Your drinking is...acceptable" -Dr. Brockavich

The best part is she accepted our desire to have me fixed ("voluntary sterilization" seems to be the human euphemism) without a fight. She even forewent the usual grope and cough, bend over and relax part of the exam, since she was referring me to an urologist anyway. So we zipped over to Dr. Kerry "Sausage Fingers" O'Reilly to make that appointment right away! By the end of the summer, I will have truly become a man (had my prostate exam, I mean), and relinquished my ability to make babies as well.

Now that I'm officially diagnosed as "not overweight" I can go and ride my bike shirtless with no guilt (right?) Off to enjoy some hot weather chores!!