urbpan: (dandelion)
You wouldn't think I would need to make a post like this, since I literally take a picture every day and say something about my life. But 3:00 doesn't tell the whole story, and it doesn't get off my chest what I need to right now, I guess.

Thursday was the Bowling for Rhinos event, the second one that I presided over as President (presidents preside, I suppose) of the local AAZK chapter. Initially we were worried because we only had spots for 40 bowlers, then we had problems filling even that many (we had about twice as many last year). Anyway, what ended up being a bigger issue was that the location was in Boston proper, meaning bad traffic and bad parking situations all around. People spent a lot of time in traffic and circling the block, so getting going was rough.

But once the event was rolling it kind of ran itself. The other AAZK officers snapped into their roles and made me feel like I didn't have to worry about every little thing. I delegated. I trusted. I circulated and saw that people were happy. I even bowled.

Friday Kikipuff called me and asked if we could get a beer after work. I went to the bank and deposited over 2000 dollars from the bowling event. Then I went to the other bank and checked my personal bank balance, discovering that I was overdrawn. Kikipuff bought me dinner and a couple beers, and I circled the drain of despondency that money troubles always drag me to. She offered to lend me money, I refused.

Kiki was going out with friends later, but wanted to hang out a little while longer, so we went to a second hand shop across the street. We flipped through CDs--an activity that I find at once comforting and depressing. I hadn't done it for years, but found that many of the same titles were in the racks. (Poor Frente!) The records were even worse, but I did come across Gordon Lightfoot's Sundown, and showed it to Kiki. She didn't really know who he was, and I don't know why I showed it to her, saying "the title track is a really catchy soft rock tune."

That night the dogs woke me up three times (to get drinks of water, and to pee). One of the times I decided to use the unexpected awake time to learn all about Gordon Lightfoot. I listened to the song "Sundown," and got it in my head for about 36 straight hours.

Saturday Alex came over, offered to lend me money--I refused. We had a nice time playing with the dogs and hovering around the fire, and talking about movie night this coming Tuesday (Pacific Rim, if we can get a copy, otherwise I'm making everyone watch Snakes on a Plane). I borrowed 30 dollars from Alexis.

That night was a housewarming party, I bought a pumpkin pie with my borrowed money, drank other peoples' beer, sat around another fire with Kiki, and made her listen to Sundown. On the way home (about 25 miles) my low fuel light came on.

For a while this morning I was sulking about being broke, thinking about begging on LiveJournal, selling things and putting out a paypal button or something. I was worried that some autopay thing would go through and hit me for another overdraft fee. I asked Alexis to paypal me some money so my account could absorb such a thing.

Today I noticed a leak around one of our toilets, said it was probably the wax seal around the drain pipe (I'd seen this happen with plumbing at work). Alexis googled it, watched a youtube video of the repair, and said, "we can fix this ourselves." I said "Are you fucking kidding me?" I'm a big proponent of paying specialists to do specialized work, but obviously was in no position to argue, what with having no money. She went to the store (with my car, getting me enough gas to last until next payday) and got a wax seal. She did all the work except moving the toilet, which I did. We put it all together and it still leaked a little. She took it apart again, then googled the problem, and decided we needed a wax-free seal thing (a big rubber thing that sticks to the underside of the toilet.

Alexis had had it with the store--already too much xmas shit and xmas shoppers. I volunteered to go buy the thing (it somehow felt good to buy something) and then we set upon fixing it again. Once it was all back together the last nut wouldn't screw onto the last bolt, even though we'd done it twice before. We gave up on it. The toilet isn't leaking. Alexis made shepherd's pie, and eating that and writing this has made me feel a little better about having no money.
urbpan: (dandelion)
Winter is crud. There are moments of magic, but I find it hard to rise above the long months of cold and damp and dark. My enthusiasm and creativity plunge, when I should be taking advantage of being homebound, time that could be spent writing and learning and/or making art. I end up writing depressing screeds like this one.

I should say that I am writing this on a new computer, one that has a battery that charges and can be moved from room to room or even outdoors. One that I could plug my microphone into and record my podcast without the electronic interference of the power cable. I read that's a problem from someone on the internet. Also the speakers are twice as loud as those on my old computer. (I'm the kind of person that would replace the radio in my car before the engine.)

Many thanks to my friend Rachel who greatly facilitated the upgrade. I don't make important decisions without being pushed or pulled over the edge, so I can only understate my appreciation. Thank you Rachel!

My goals for the new year are the kind that I'll only fulfill if I have someone there to help me along or give me a substantial shove. The help I need on the "learning to play a new instrument" goal may come from my friend Kiki, who is offering to lend me one of her pointy guitars, and show me a chord or two. The "brew my own beer" goal will be met when the scoffing about how easy it is (supplied by my friends and relatives) gets to be too much and I go buy the damn kit already. I'll also have to stop buying beer for a few months to save up for the kit.

The first Urban Nature Walk of 2013 will happen Sunday the 27th, location to be announced. A good friend who works for the Department of Conservation and Recreation has tentatively agreed to co-lead the walk. She wasn't enthusiastic about leading a walk in places that have been degraded in her mind as "work" but I'm hoping to tap into her knowledge. I also hope that having a group of interested amateurs listening to what she has to say will help spark some of that enthusiasm.

Maybe it's just winter.
urbpan: (Default)


The dogs enjoy their unfettered access to the kitchen, now that foster dog Cammie is with her permanent home.


Five years ago today I stumbled across a parody video and it took me all day to verify that it was a parody. Also I took a 3:00 snapshot in a public bathroom.

Today I plan to take Charlie some place to walk around in the sunshine. The January funk has me hard, I can only hope that some time in the woods and the fresh air can make me feel a little more like life is worth living. It is, right? That's why so many of us are doing it?
urbpan: (Default)
I've lost some enthusiasm for my livejournal projects, I think. Maybe it was the break during vacation, or how busy my life in meatspace is about to become/is becoming. Maybe I've lost my mojo.
Seeing pictures of myself in a bathing suit was pretty depressing. I feel like Cathy (the comic strip character). I've started tracking my food intake again, which by itself causes a change in behavior. My will-power gets better when I think about having to write down each donut.
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Spring is amazing and beautiful and overwhelming. All the migratory songbirds are back. This weekend Alexis is going to try to photograph some warblers. Better, more coherent post later, I hope.

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