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Orlando Science Center
Sep. 11th, 2014 07:15 am
Orlando Science Center is not too different from the Boston Museum of Science where I got my start in animal care. They have a lot more alligators though.
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Something funny happened on Twitter
Sep. 3rd, 2014 07:42 pm
First my friend Matt sent out a few tweets about wild boar. I replied with a request and got more than I deserved.
In honor of the fact that I'll be seeing Chris Hardwick (the nerdist) entertain Boston at the Wilbur in an hour in a half, I'll quickly share a nerdy thing that I've been momentarily obsessed with.
Alexis and I have been watching Star Trek: Deep Space Nine recently (all star treks are on netflix instant btw). At the beginning of one episode they showed a child eating oatmeal. All the food on the space station is made by the replicators--machines that use transporter technology to generate food and other items from a stored bank of matter (I read up on them today). Presumably this means not only can you procure ANY food you can think of (or have the schematics or software for) but that the machine could be programmed to alter the nutritional content of the food.
If I had access to a replicator, I might say "Tea, Earl Grey; hot," once or twice, just to work on my Patrick Stewart impersonation, but most of the time I'd be saying stuff like "Masamam curry tofu, medium spicy, with pineapple chunks." Or I'd say "Crunchberries, large bowl with lactose-free milk!" Since the machine is generating the food--it never grew, it never lived, it was never killed or harvested--you could say, "veal cutlet, breaded, with dolphin sauce" guilt free. Hell you could have big bowl of baby monkey hearts, if that's your thing (those guys that are black on one side and white on the other eat baby monkey hearts, look it up).
But I would live on DS9 for a long long time before it occurred to me to say "Oatmeal, lumpy, too hot on the inside, slimy and cold on the outside." (This describes every bowl of oatmeal I've eaten.) I brought this up with some of my coworkers, and five out of six of them said the same thing to me: "I love oatmeal. What's wrong with oatmeal?"
...
"Spaghettios, room temperature, from the can."
Make it so.
Alexis and I have been watching Star Trek: Deep Space Nine recently (all star treks are on netflix instant btw). At the beginning of one episode they showed a child eating oatmeal. All the food on the space station is made by the replicators--machines that use transporter technology to generate food and other items from a stored bank of matter (I read up on them today). Presumably this means not only can you procure ANY food you can think of (or have the schematics or software for) but that the machine could be programmed to alter the nutritional content of the food.
If I had access to a replicator, I might say "Tea, Earl Grey; hot," once or twice, just to work on my Patrick Stewart impersonation, but most of the time I'd be saying stuff like "Masamam curry tofu, medium spicy, with pineapple chunks." Or I'd say "Crunchberries, large bowl with lactose-free milk!" Since the machine is generating the food--it never grew, it never lived, it was never killed or harvested--you could say, "veal cutlet, breaded, with dolphin sauce" guilt free. Hell you could have big bowl of baby monkey hearts, if that's your thing (those guys that are black on one side and white on the other eat baby monkey hearts, look it up).
But I would live on DS9 for a long long time before it occurred to me to say "Oatmeal, lumpy, too hot on the inside, slimy and cold on the outside." (This describes every bowl of oatmeal I've eaten.) I brought this up with some of my coworkers, and five out of six of them said the same thing to me: "I love oatmeal. What's wrong with oatmeal?"
...
"Spaghettios, room temperature, from the can."
Make it so.
To eat brood II or not?
May. 26th, 2013 07:30 amThere's a lot of talk about eating cicadas on the internet these days--probably I'm encountering it through my own self-filtering. Brood II, in case your own self-filtering has insulated you from this knowledge, is one of the 17 year cicada events on the east coast. From North Carolina to southern Connecticut there will be millions upon millions of large red-eyed insects emerging from their prime number slumber to ascend trees and emit their decibel-shattering love call.
I've only ever experienced annual cicadas--green, "dog day" cicadas which are loud and briefly plentiful, but nothing like these periodical events. I'm eager to travel to the action, perhaps to New Haven, a city I've never visited but that everyone assumes I'm from when I say I grew up in Connecticut.
There seems to be a certain amount of anxiety about this cicada event, fear driven by...I don't know what exactly. The way that cicadas look? The fact that there will suddenly be thousands around, making encounters between humans and these insects more likely? A friend posted a photo of a display of insecticides from (presumably) a hardware store, prominently advertising the fact that the products would kill cicadas. This is the worst kind of fear-pandering, since killing these animals does exactly nothing to control the "problem" of 17 year cicadas. They are active for a short period during one summer, mate and lay eggs, and then disappear again for the length of time that it takes a human to become an adult. So it may appear that by spraying whatever poison around you have made them go away, but they will go away with or without your participation.
The entomophagy community is using the UN recommendations and the Brood II emergence as a synergistic opportunity to promote bug-eating. Supposedly a southern Connecticut sushi restaurant is preparing to (or joking about) make cicada sushi. I'll take the tempura, please--uncooked invertebrates are likely to harbor parasites. This NatGeo Article helpfully adds "[their] plant-based diet gives them a green, asparagus-like flavor."
Of course most Westerners are not among the 2 billion people of the world who already include insects as part of their diet. There's a taboo on this class of arthropod, a disgust borne purely from cultural bias. My favorite recent analysis comes from (of course) a comedian, Andy Zaltzman, on The Bugle Podcast:
"There's no way I'm prepared to eat insects. Mashed up connective tissue of pigs? Yeah, yeah, I'm happy with that. The livers of birds that basically amount to aerial vermin? Yeah! The hacked to pieces corpse of a mechanically slaughtered baby cow? Absolutely! Insects? Never! Unless they're basically insects that live in the sea, in which case, OH YEAH give me a bit of mayonnaise and let me rip its head off! And eat it whole, stomach included, in one go--I don't care if it's dead eyes are staring at me, and if it was waving at me from a bucket ten minutes ago--YUM."
I've only ever experienced annual cicadas--green, "dog day" cicadas which are loud and briefly plentiful, but nothing like these periodical events. I'm eager to travel to the action, perhaps to New Haven, a city I've never visited but that everyone assumes I'm from when I say I grew up in Connecticut.
There seems to be a certain amount of anxiety about this cicada event, fear driven by...I don't know what exactly. The way that cicadas look? The fact that there will suddenly be thousands around, making encounters between humans and these insects more likely? A friend posted a photo of a display of insecticides from (presumably) a hardware store, prominently advertising the fact that the products would kill cicadas. This is the worst kind of fear-pandering, since killing these animals does exactly nothing to control the "problem" of 17 year cicadas. They are active for a short period during one summer, mate and lay eggs, and then disappear again for the length of time that it takes a human to become an adult. So it may appear that by spraying whatever poison around you have made them go away, but they will go away with or without your participation.
The entomophagy community is using the UN recommendations and the Brood II emergence as a synergistic opportunity to promote bug-eating. Supposedly a southern Connecticut sushi restaurant is preparing to (or joking about) make cicada sushi. I'll take the tempura, please--uncooked invertebrates are likely to harbor parasites. This NatGeo Article helpfully adds "[their] plant-based diet gives them a green, asparagus-like flavor."
Of course most Westerners are not among the 2 billion people of the world who already include insects as part of their diet. There's a taboo on this class of arthropod, a disgust borne purely from cultural bias. My favorite recent analysis comes from (of course) a comedian, Andy Zaltzman, on The Bugle Podcast:
"There's no way I'm prepared to eat insects. Mashed up connective tissue of pigs? Yeah, yeah, I'm happy with that. The livers of birds that basically amount to aerial vermin? Yeah! The hacked to pieces corpse of a mechanically slaughtered baby cow? Absolutely! Insects? Never! Unless they're basically insects that live in the sea, in which case, OH YEAH give me a bit of mayonnaise and let me rip its head off! And eat it whole, stomach included, in one go--I don't care if it's dead eyes are staring at me, and if it was waving at me from a bucket ten minutes ago--YUM."
3:00 snapshot #1239
Apr. 2nd, 2013 06:53 pm
In this snapshot from the weekend, Alexis rolls herself a cigarette after having planted veggie seeds in the starter pots. In the background, a broken picket in our fence gate taunts me. But hey guess what we did last night?
We went to the taping of NPR's Ask Me Another! We've been excited about the show since Jonathan Coulton first announced that he was a part of it. I was very critical of it when it first started, but I've listened to every episode as a podcast. Part of my criticism had to do with host Ophira Eisenberg, (I just had to backwards anagram "her ripe begonias" to get close to spelling her name right) I didn't think she had good flow. But seeing her live was revelatory--she improvises very well, handles difficult guests with aplomb, and has polite but authoritative control of the stage.
Here she is preparing to interview Barney Frank, who got massive applause, especially when his work for gay rights was mentioned. He quipped that when he became a congressman in 1981 it was not acceptable to be a gay man in public life, but when he retired last year, his same sex marriage was respectable--but being a member of congress is very unpopular.
JoCo played "The Future Soon" as a full length warmup, a short version of "Brookline," and the first bit of the Pixies' "Here Comes Your Man" (after the Barney Frank segment).
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The Bitter Buddha
Mar. 9th, 2013 04:56 pm
If you like stand-up comedy you should know who Eddie Pepitone is.
There's a documentary about him called The Bitter Buddha which is currently playing at selected theaters and is also available on Amazon and iTunes for instant download. Eddie's standup is completely original, amazingly dynamic and athletic, and funny as hell. I saw him perform at the ImprovBoston last Monday. Even though I'd heard him on podcasts (he's the standard closer for live WTF shows) and seen his routines on YouTube, I wasn't prepared for how engaging he is as a live performer. He's often described as "a comedian's comedian" and has been on the edge of superstardom for decades. It must be frustrating for him to see other big yelling comics get more famous than him and then flame out. He's very different from people he might be compared to like Sam Kinison or Lewis Black, in that he has a vulnerability and authenticity behind the funny rants; he is insecure and self-searching even as he rails against the corporate machine.
His tweets are excellent. Recent example "Etiquette: When destroying your life and the lives of others ALWAYS tip 20%." He stars in the youtube single panel comic "Puddin.'"
Recently he married a good friend of mine from high school, and it's nice to be acquainted with him.
If you are in New York or Chicago you can see him in the next few days. Schedule here. EDITED to add--apparently he's at SXSW right now. Why not? Everyone else is.
Forbidden dog names
Dec. 8th, 2012 06:27 pmOkay everyone, we have all of human culture and even nonsense words to draw from. Before we name a dog something that 3 other dogs on the block are named, let us think hard and choose something else. In general, please avoid anything that makes your dog sound like a sports utility vehicle or a stripper. The following names are retired from use for dogs for at least 2 generations:
Abbie
Bailey
Bella
Benji
Buddy
Champ
Charlie
Chico/Chica
Dawson
Gracie
Harley
Holly
Hunter
Jack/Jackson etc
Jake
Lacey
Lily
Maggie
Max etc
Mitzi
Molly
Murphy
Oscar
Pepe
Peyton
Rocco/Rocky
Rosie
Roxy
Sadie
Sammy
Sandy
Sidney
Sierra
Snooki (permanent ban)
Snoopy
Sophie
Stella
Winnie
Winston
Thank you for your cooperation. I will think of 50 more by tomorrow.
Abbie
Bailey
Bella
Benji
Buddy
Champ
Charlie
Chico/Chica
Dawson
Gracie
Harley
Holly
Hunter
Jack/Jackson etc
Jake
Lacey
Lily
Maggie
Max etc
Mitzi
Molly
Murphy
Oscar
Pepe
Peyton
Rocco/Rocky
Rosie
Roxy
Sadie
Sammy
Sandy
Sidney
Sierra
Snooki (permanent ban)
Snoopy
Sophie
Stella
Winnie
Winston
Thank you for your cooperation. I will think of 50 more by tomorrow.
Toxo-hodgmania
Feb. 11th, 2012 10:54 amA number of people have posted a link to this article about a scientist who has shown that the parasitic protist Toxoplasma causes human behavior to change. Men become introverted, while infected women tend to be more outgoing. (He goes as far as to say that the parasite is responsible for thousands of car accidents every year, and may be a cause of schizophrenia.) I am not surprised by this, as I thought it was common knowledge (at least among nature nerds) that the parasite changes the behavior of rats, causing them to be attracted to the scent of cat urine, in order to get eaten by cats and get the parasite into the only place it can reproduce: inside a cat. There is some lay speculation among parasite fans that "crazy cat lady" syndrome is a form of toxoplasmosis.
What I am surprised by is that fact that no one has brought up the prophecies of John Hodgman, in his wise tome, THAT IS ALL. I will rectify that now, with a short excerpt of Hodgman's treatment of the subject:
January 11, 2012: The CDC announces they have now determined that toxoplasmosis has infected a third of the world's population. And what is more--IT IS COMMUNICATING WITH US.
January 12, 2012: The TOXOPLASMOTIC HIVE MIND makes first contact with the human race, sending an elderly woman draped in cats to the White House to deliver a greeting card. It is a Valentine's Day card from 1982 and below the printed message are hand-printed the words "Good morning. We want your planet. Come visit!"
January 13, 2012: The TOXOPLASMOTIC HIVE MIND activates the host organism known as Charlie Rose. On his program, Charlie Rose is seated alone at his desk, which is covered with rats. "We regret our last transmission," he says to the camera morosely. "All we desire is our own land where our moody men and promiscuous women can live and eat cat feces in peace. You have ten days to reply, or we take your planet." Charlie Rose suggests the new land shall be called Toxoplassachusetts.
Reading that alone in a bar caused me to burst out laughing, which made my neighbors shift uncomfortably on their stools. I didn't explain to them what was so funny--the parasites told me to keep it quiet.
What I am surprised by is that fact that no one has brought up the prophecies of John Hodgman, in his wise tome, THAT IS ALL. I will rectify that now, with a short excerpt of Hodgman's treatment of the subject:
January 11, 2012: The CDC announces they have now determined that toxoplasmosis has infected a third of the world's population. And what is more--IT IS COMMUNICATING WITH US.
January 12, 2012: The TOXOPLASMOTIC HIVE MIND makes first contact with the human race, sending an elderly woman draped in cats to the White House to deliver a greeting card. It is a Valentine's Day card from 1982 and below the printed message are hand-printed the words "Good morning. We want your planet. Come visit!"
January 13, 2012: The TOXOPLASMOTIC HIVE MIND activates the host organism known as Charlie Rose. On his program, Charlie Rose is seated alone at his desk, which is covered with rats. "We regret our last transmission," he says to the camera morosely. "All we desire is our own land where our moody men and promiscuous women can live and eat cat feces in peace. You have ten days to reply, or we take your planet." Charlie Rose suggests the new land shall be called Toxoplassachusetts.
Reading that alone in a bar caused me to burst out laughing, which made my neighbors shift uncomfortably on their stools. I didn't explain to them what was so funny--the parasites told me to keep it quiet.
The End is Nigh, perhaps
Nov. 21st, 2011 07:16 pm
Alexis and I went to a reading last week, conducted by the author of the book THAT IS ALL. It is the third in a series of complete world knowledge made up by HODGMAN, known better to me as "Judge John Hodgman" or @hodgman. He explained that the problem of coming up with complete world world knowledge, is that the world keeps adding more information to know, therefore, if the world were to end sometime such as December 21 2012, as the Mayans may have predicted, the complete world knowledge would then be truly complete.
It was a very entertaining and reasonably-priced evening of entertainment. And we took some pictures. Some of these are by me and some are by Alexis when she took my camera away from me to make it take better pictures.
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3:00 snapshot #759
May. 28th, 2011 06:36 pm
I cleaned the flying insect traps earlier this week. (Then began deploying them.)
I don't know if you follow Kinky Friedman on twitter, but I wanted to share what he said today. "During the VietNam war, I was in Borneo with the Peace Corps helping farmers who'd been farming successfully for 2,000 years learn to farm." I thought that was pretty damn funny.
Also on twitter, but also also on LiveJournal, I learned about a music video for an incredibly boring Bruno Mars song (that's not redundant, the man has some talent) starring Leonard Nimoy. You will believe an 80 year old man can be hilariously cantankerous without uttering a word! Google it, I won't link to it here.
And finally, from our good friend @MichaelPollan, here's a short video showing a small market in what must be an unbelievably densely populated corner of the world. Is there no place to sell vegetables nearby that doesn't feature regularly scheduled risk of death?
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Does your job inspire you to make drinks?
Feb. 25th, 2011 06:31 pmI dismantled a sling designed for holding up a flamingo with injured legs/feet today. I thought about the phrase "Flamingo Sling," and imagined a pink frothy drink. Also this morning I removed squirrel carcasses from a crawlspace. "Dead Squirrel in the Crawlspace" is a much less appealing phrase, so I imagined this would be cocktail of gin and durian juice.
I sent these imaginings into the Twittersphere (composed of 4 or 5 close friends, 20 or 30 elljay friends, and 30 or 40 spambots) and got some very clever job-related potent potables in response.
@iagbegreg, the owner of a dog walking company came up with these:
Chukkit: Oj, vodka, grenadine.
Brookline Animal Control: whiskey, sweet vermouth, splash of seltzer
Wet Spaniel: Bourbon, brandy, drambuie.
Off Leash Dog: a Long island ice T with two shakes of bitters.
@kmatt45, a dispatcher for a delivery company thought of some, and also cemented the most succinct hashtag: #workinspiredcocktails
The Direct Rush: vodka, Red Bull and Bloody Mary mix. Gah, that sounds terrible!
The Sweaty Biker: rum, coconut water, pineapple juice. HEAVILY salted rim.
The Grumpy Dispatcher: half iced coffee, half seltzer, two shots of Jager.
@DJ_Christ_2006, a graphic designer came up with these:
The "iStockPhoto-tini": 2 oz 'well' gin + 1 oz 'well' vodka, poured into a half-full TEENI™(Any flavor).
The "Papyrus": 3 oz Irish whiskey, 3 oz Chinese plum wine. Serve warm, garnish with a saltine cracker.
The "½ Inch Bleed":This is any beer served in a pint glass, but refilled to overflowing after every swig.
Then I remembered that at a coworker's going away party I actually had a work inspired cocktail:
Fecal Float: layered vodka and kahlua served in a test tube.
What I'd really like to do is to perfectly capture the look of euthanasia fluid (we use the pink stuff). The cocktail will be clearer than a Flamingo Sling, and @c0tt0nmanifest0 said "i think the white coconut rum w a splash of chambord." Sounds delicious!
I sent these imaginings into the Twittersphere (composed of 4 or 5 close friends, 20 or 30 elljay friends, and 30 or 40 spambots) and got some very clever job-related potent potables in response.
@iagbegreg, the owner of a dog walking company came up with these:
Chukkit: Oj, vodka, grenadine.
Brookline Animal Control: whiskey, sweet vermouth, splash of seltzer
Wet Spaniel: Bourbon, brandy, drambuie.
Off Leash Dog: a Long island ice T with two shakes of bitters.
@kmatt45, a dispatcher for a delivery company thought of some, and also cemented the most succinct hashtag: #workinspiredcocktails
The Direct Rush: vodka, Red Bull and Bloody Mary mix. Gah, that sounds terrible!
The Sweaty Biker: rum, coconut water, pineapple juice. HEAVILY salted rim.
The Grumpy Dispatcher: half iced coffee, half seltzer, two shots of Jager.
@DJ_Christ_2006, a graphic designer came up with these:
The "iStockPhoto-tini": 2 oz 'well' gin + 1 oz 'well' vodka, poured into a half-full TEENI™(Any flavor).
The "Papyrus": 3 oz Irish whiskey, 3 oz Chinese plum wine. Serve warm, garnish with a saltine cracker.
The "½ Inch Bleed":This is any beer served in a pint glass, but refilled to overflowing after every swig.
Then I remembered that at a coworker's going away party I actually had a work inspired cocktail:
Fecal Float: layered vodka and kahlua served in a test tube.
What I'd really like to do is to perfectly capture the look of euthanasia fluid (we use the pink stuff). The cocktail will be clearer than a Flamingo Sling, and @c0tt0nmanifest0 said "i think the white coconut rum w a splash of chambord." Sounds delicious!
Urban nature in the news--old news
Apr. 17th, 2010 04:27 pmFollowing TweetsofOld is a good way to keep up on urban nature news (and news from the farms, one supposes) from a hundred years ago or so:
Mrs. Hall,84, was bitten on the thumb by a rattlesnake. Her arm was corded, then held in a pan of kerosene until Dr. Moorer arrived. AL1927
Lightning struck a large hickory tree 20 rods from J.K. Patch's, shivering it into pieces and splitting a large rock. MA1875
A Cyclone from the Dragoon Mtns visited Tombstone at sundown. 100 head of steers were scattered in all directions. AZ1889
O.B. Fleak has a way with mules, but not, sadly, with women. TN1892
When the hailstorm ended, four of Peter Lamb's 235 fowls had been knocked cuckoo. MT1930
At the old bachelor's house were observed innumerable and very large cock roaches, one of which filled a thread box. IA1898
Wild, stray goats have been numerous in the vicinity of 119th street and 5th avenue. NYC1882
Albert Dennis was bitten by a water-moccasin, which he drew up in a bucket of water from a well. TX1893
E. B. Kornforth lost control of his auto and met with a pear tree. He told police thought he was being attacked by a bat. MI1916
A boy was bitten by a snake at Staffords' on Tuesday while reaching his hand under the house for a marble. KS1881
The Italians and French of Barry County can be seen picking the hedge leaves for their silk worms. MO1890
Scald your possum as you scald a pig. Scrape off all the hair. Some prefer shaving it with a razor. KY1909
Denver is providing a fine of 10 cents for every dandelion allowed to bloom within the city limits. CO1909
Mrs. Hall,84, was bitten on the thumb by a rattlesnake. Her arm was corded, then held in a pan of kerosene until Dr. Moorer arrived. AL1927
Lightning struck a large hickory tree 20 rods from J.K. Patch's, shivering it into pieces and splitting a large rock. MA1875
A Cyclone from the Dragoon Mtns visited Tombstone at sundown. 100 head of steers were scattered in all directions. AZ1889
O.B. Fleak has a way with mules, but not, sadly, with women. TN1892
When the hailstorm ended, four of Peter Lamb's 235 fowls had been knocked cuckoo. MT1930
At the old bachelor's house were observed innumerable and very large cock roaches, one of which filled a thread box. IA1898
Wild, stray goats have been numerous in the vicinity of 119th street and 5th avenue. NYC1882
Albert Dennis was bitten by a water-moccasin, which he drew up in a bucket of water from a well. TX1893
E. B. Kornforth lost control of his auto and met with a pear tree. He told police thought he was being attacked by a bat. MI1916
A boy was bitten by a snake at Staffords' on Tuesday while reaching his hand under the house for a marble. KS1881
The Italians and French of Barry County can be seen picking the hedge leaves for their silk worms. MO1890
Scald your possum as you scald a pig. Scrape off all the hair. Some prefer shaving it with a razor. KY1909
Denver is providing a fine of 10 cents for every dandelion allowed to bloom within the city limits. CO1909
Reader sensitivy litmus test
Dec. 4th, 2009 04:47 pmTrying to get out of Christmas by saying you aren't Christian is like trying to get out of prison rape by saying you aren't gay.
Top 5 Synonyms for "Cloaca"
Nov. 26th, 2009 07:51 am5. The Everything Chute
4. Omnorifice
3. Eventful vent
2. Sphincter of love
1. Hoo-ha
(okay now you think of some)
4. Omnorifice
3. Eventful vent
2. Sphincter of love
1. Hoo-ha
(okay now you think of some)
Biology lesson from Cracked.com
Jun. 26th, 2009 08:37 pmThey may swear a lot, but this article from Cracked.com is more entertaining and contains less misinformation than the average piece of science journalism. Their "5 most hated creatures (don't deserve it)" even short circuits an article which I've never gotten around to writing: "WHY are mosquitoes?"
